http://www.city.shinjuku.lg.jp/foreign/english/oshirase/teiki/aids.html

If that doesn’t work with your schedule or location, I would suggest searching for clinics in your area that offer English. (Forgive me for assuming that if you spoke and wrote Japanese well enough to deal with a Japanese hospital, you’d simply search for one of those, as they’re numerous.) Any clinic can either perform the test or refer you to a place that will. They may not be free, but it may be worth spending a few yen for the peace of mind.

I really appreciate you reading!

Thanks,

Ken

Seriously, the “quick Jesus” story is hilarious. I wish I’d thought of “quick Jesus.” Damn you, Japan it UP! Glad you got cured though. Good call going to a Western doctor. It’s like Japanese doctors are practicing medicine as a hobby. If you’re breathing, you’re fine, and they just give you some mystery powder to drink. I guess if you’ve got faith, maybe it’ll cure you. You just gotta belieeeeve.

“You wear glasses? Take these low level herbal things I call medicinizle! You’ll be cured of bad vision and it’ll magically cure Ken’s imaginary aids from a distance! Yes! And stop taking showers, take baths like normal people.” Next visit “You didn’t take them at the exactly the same time of day. Your bath was not long enough. Eat more junk that cures nothing because I’m a doctor. Now go die.”

When I was in my first apartment downtown I was randomly getting really sick and thought I was going to die. Stuff I said made no sense, I’d fall asleep thinking it’s the end of my life. I wake up 3 hours later. I call it the “quick Jesus” because it was hours instead of days. I went to the doctor probably 3 times, 2 different doctors. Last one said “Yep, it’s your dog. Get rid of your cute dog… the only living creature in Japan that understands your hip hop English.” So I got rid of her. It was sad.

The next day had a Jesus moment again. So I cleaned the apartment like a lunatic over the next 3 days multiple time until the quick Jesus hit again on day 4. I said screw this! So I looked up a doctor who’s not Japanese. He’s like “Dude. You’ve been taking medicine from Japanese doctors? The country where Tylenol is prescription only? I bet 100% you’re allergic to dust. Take this (Flonase) Flixonase … Western (aka ‘regular’) strength … and go get an allergy test. Give it three days and you’ll be fine”

So I take the nasal spray, within 24 hours I felt awesome! A few days later cured! I had an allergy test and got tested for everything on the menu. The only thing I’m allergic to is dust and dust mites. I was pretty upset and thought about billing the dog hating Japanese doctor and billing him for my loss. At least now I know I’m not going to fall asleep and die… maybe.